Surprisingly I realize I draw from my sources of pain: regrets, humiliation, fear, disappointments, isolation, depression, anger and failures to make good decisions. The reason is because, while making a serious decision, everything is intangible. The consequences of what ever I decide is removed during the decision making process.
Memory and the painful conditioning of my petty personal tragedies help make the consequences more real to me; the way some depressed people would cut themselves to feel. I know it sounds morbid, but to act in a way that is decisive and purposeful requires us to practically feel the consequences licking at our feet.
In the hard decision making in work, everyone needs some pain to draw on to help realize consequences… while at the same time live with this tragedies locked up in some place where it cannot rule our lives.
I guess that is why I sometimes am detached regarding some advice I give; it takes that pain to understand the urgency or relevance of the advice. If the person does not have it then, they cannot relate and the advice cannot be made to be intimately understood.
Damn, there is a cognitive term for being far removed from consequences of decisions… can’t remember the term right now.
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