Game in the Brain

 I remember a friend helping me understand a research paper – 

“What does it say?” 

“Ok now, why does it say it?” 

“Where there do you disagree with? Ok where in the chain of reasoning is there a break? Go Paragraph by paragraph and see if the logic follows” 

“Ok now what is criteria by which you argue with? What is the basis of that criteria?” 

“Cite it.” 

You can see his irritated expression he’s trying to control by looking away from me – and I quickly realize I am working off an impression instead of a basis. I got carried away by someone’s argument without checking the basis because it appealed to my bias. Of course I felt stupid, but better feeling stupid in private than in public where more people can see me. 

I stopped trusting my memory and use links instead. If I’m going to put forth a claim I better just read it and ask if I understood it correctly by using my own words. 

And even now when I read a document I havent checked for a long time I notice my memory of it is distorted. 

My friends irritated face as he taught me to read an academic paper is what I remember when I see a claim put forth without any basis, data or analysis. 

Paying it forward I just kindly do what he did but try to be more beginner or user friendly. I try not to be irritated and more patient. Someone was patient enough to teach me.